Shattered dreams - one father's story
When we start a family, we have hopes and dreams for our child, and certain expectations of what family life will be like.
Last year, we heard from a father about life with his 11-year-old autistic son and 8-year-old daughter with galactosaemia (an eating disorder). He wrote of struggles he and his wife have faced and their shattered dreams as a family
Here are some of the questions they asked themselves, and some of the thoughts they've had about their particular situation...
"Why do both our children have something wrong with them? Although we were unaware that we were both carriers of her genetic condition, we feel in some way 'responsible' for our daughter's condition."
"When your children are born you have some expectations for them in terms of schooling, work and perhaps starting their own family in time . At the moment, we certainly have to consider 'another way' because our son can barely read; we cannot let him play outside by himself (he wanders off, has hit people and others may take advantage of him); employment prospects are limited; and he may never be able to live independently. We have yet to tell our daughter that it is unlikely that she will be able to have children."
" We face criticism from people , either for not disciplining our son (yes, he is naughty, but sometimes he's just distressed/confused), or for being 'picky' about our daughter's food (but it is vital that we keep to her diet)."
"Situations like this put marriages under a lot of stress ."
"One child's disability has an impact on the other child, limiting where you can go and things you can do as a family."
"We accept that there are no answers, but we are grateful to friends, Social Services, and organisations like Care for the Family for offering support and understanding."
This information is supplied in good faith, but Care for the Family cannot accept responsibility for any advice or recommendations made by other organisations or resources.